REALity

Read carefully; Life after college will never be the same. So enjoy it while it last, or go back to school when you have the chance before you get sucked into the world of responsibilities and obligations.

Before you had college parties, random nights of unexpected events. You didn't have to worry about health care, bills, too much about the future. The future became the next weekend. Worrying about where to go, what to wear, and most importantly who you'll meet. You could afford to be silly and stay up late because you were a "college student". Now you are an adult late nights happen only if you have a reason and a good one at that. We develop anxieties about our positions and roles in society as we are no longer college kids. Some of us struggle to adapt to the "real world", some of us easily transition into the horrible 9-5 work week that becomes 9-ruin your life.

I'm one of those who is struggling to transition into this cookie cutter life that has been laid out for us to adapt to. I could sit here and blame the economy for me not being able to find a real job yet, and i will. But I should be clear that my struggle is just as metaphysical as it is physical.

I wish it were okay to publicly speak about not wanting these responsibilities that come with adulthood, like bills and cars and big houses. I dont not want these things NOT because Im lazy and i dont want to work, but because they have no value to me in life. I think there are bigger problems we should be working 9-5 for other than finding a house, getting a car and paying bills for meaningless things, like the problems our previous and current leaders have and are creating in our world.

I think people should stop and think about how the world is living and has been for hundreds of years and see when that there was a time where many of todays problems were non-existent. And then go back to that time and see what we were or were not doing and realize that we are all living in such a destructive system.

Unfortunately i was sucked into this disgusting system in what we call the land of opportunity. You have friendly, generous creditors giving you the "opportunity" to spend only a few short months before you completely understood how horrible this system works before you are even legal to drink in the US. So me, like many other poor college students took this "opportunity" and well the rest is history.

Back to work..

Existance

When you experience something traumatic, its sticks with you forever. It becomes a part of you, a part of your every day, a part of your morning coffee, your newspaper, your ride to work, your new favorite song. And only you are the only one who fully understands the capacity of what happened. But what do you do when you are asked to explain what you are going through? How do you put into words what you carry around every day? And when you cant explain it, it kills you because you wish you could make that person understand, but you know you never will. And so you are forced to carry this burden for the rest of your life, and no one can help you make your days any easier except you...because you are the only one who knows how it feels. 

It's all so intense and can be overwhelming at times, but you've learned to accept it and its all so routine. Sometimes its like you're locked in this box and cant get out! Like you're being suffocated with all these emotions and you just need out. 

You've forgotten what it feels like to wake up with no worries or thoughts. 

February 14th

Ah, February 14th. The day of love, red roses, chocolates and excessive PDA. America loves it! Sitting at work, I over hear my boss talking about valentines.."i hate valentines day. it's like imposed loving..so enforced!"...I laugh to myself..sharing the comment to a friend on G-chat. 

Yes, Im one of those cynical bitches who hates valentines for many more reasons that most people do..not because im single, and dont have anyone to buy me flowers or take me to dinner, because i have that, but because like every other holiday in America, its so commercialized and overly done which makes it so meaningless! It becomes nothing more than the materials itself! Valentines day equals chocolat, flowers and dinner, and maybe a marriage proposal or something...I mean its definitely no christmas or easter, so it hasnt lost that much value (it actually has more, literally speaking) okay (pun unintended). But you get what I mean. 

A friend texted me happy valentines day, and i replied back thanx but its so over rated. He wrote back "where is your spirit for love and romance?".....and i replied..."it died along with chivalry"......He then proceeded with this very unexpected comment "i'll give it new life if you let me"....which i will admit made me smile..but i immediately realized how cheesy this was (sorry if you are reading this)...I proceeded to allow him to prove me wrong, and he accepted. But now I'm thinking, maybe I should have kept it at that because if chivalry were to come back...sadly, I dont think i would know what to do with it.

The World's Imbalance

How can we live in a world so imbalanced? Where one half of the world is trying to lose weight and one half is trying to gain weight? One half skips class and one half actually understands the value of education, where they don't wish for snow days (let alone have them), the pray and wish that they can go to school, make it to school. They walk miles, ride for hours all the while hoping they will not be raped, attacked, or caught in the middle of some unjust conflict. While we worry about what to wear the next day, they worry about what they will eat for the week. What has happened to fundamental human rights? When will food sovereignty be returned to these developing countries. How are the countries that produce the most amount of food for the the whole world, suffering from hunger and malnutrition? Haven't we all learned that the "trickle down" theory does not work!? When will distribution of wealth become just? Yes, globalization has allowed us to come a long way. It has allowed me to post this blog so millions all over the world can read it, but it has not allowed the coffee farmer from Ethiopia who spends 13 hours a day in the field anything. The people who are contributing to the world economy the most are gaining the least. Some may say this is a form of slavery. Transnational corporations controlling agricultural systems of peripheral and semi-peripheral countries for their advantage must come to an end.

Education
I always wished that I grew up in my country, because I feel as though I would appreciate my life more. When I see stories of people from impoverished countries who have come from nothing and have been through the unimaginable and all they want is to go to school, it hurts me because I then wonder, is that what it takes for me to value education? Must I go through hardship and struggle in order to not miss my French class tomorrow, just because "I'm tired". It troubles me that although I do value my education more than most people in the US and European countries might, my motivation is not as high. I have realized that with out education you can not go far in life and that I remind myself everyday as I walk those 10 minutes to class, that there are girls half way across the world walking hours to class, barefoot.

Sort of Fairytale

I recently came to the realization that life is too short. Yes we can always wait tilll tomorrow to do something, but what if there is no tomorrow? We will never know so we should always do what we want to do when we want to.

Have you ever met someone so extraordinary? Okay maybe not EXTRAORDINARY, but someone who took your breath away. Someone who was more than just good company, but someone who made you want to be a better person. Someone who inspires you everytime they speak. Someone so passionate and with such strong character. Someone with an old soul. Someone who has a story behind their eyes. We seldom come across this "someone" in our life time, but when we do we should not hesitate. First reactions might be disbelief, but you must quickly get over that and accept it.

Life is too short. If you come across "someone" in your life time take that chance. Be with that someone if you can. As much as you can. Be happy because you deserve it because its better to try than wonder what if ...

Even if it doesnt last..live your fantasy until it ends. Not every story has a happy ending, but it can have a happy beginning.

Current Mood: ECSTATIC

So I am taking a power nap before I have to get up for class and I am awaken by a phone call from my best friend from 4 years ago!!!!!!!! I could not be happier and excited right now! She left me 4 years ago to go to Ethiopia because of some sudden change...:( and then I never heard from her since...A few cousins of mine from back home said she was doing good because they went to the same school, but I still couldnt believe she was gone. Just up and out of my life! We used to have the best time together:) Now God has her brought her bright soul back in my life and I could not be happier...can't wait to see her tonight after class!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I just moved my magnet to the ECSTATIC face on the fridge:))

Religion

How important is religion in todays society? Hundreds of years ago people never converted for marriage. There was no such thing. You simply could not marry outside of your religion. In most case outside of your ethnicity either. It was shunned upon. Today we have Christians converting to Islam, Jewish etc..or even vice versa. But, in most families it is still not accepted. If you were not born into a certain religion then you are not truly a Christian, Muslim etc.

So, my question is. Is religion any different from race? There are families today that do not allow marriage outside of their own ethnicity, or even race. That is a form of discrimination. Is not allowing marriage outside your own religion considered discrimination or even racism?

As a Christian myself, I am a frim believer in my faith and do understand that ultimately if it may happen, that one will marry someone with the same beliefs. Yet, I think, if you can befriend someone of another religion, why can't you marry them as well. (I answer my own questions..as you can see I am in a dilemna with myself).

Of course there is always the politics behind it. Families may clash, and communities may be outraged, but in the end of the day...The point is love does not have a color, race, ethnicity, or religion. So are we to deny ourselves the possibility of ultimate happiness, whatever that may be, by denying ourselves the opportunity?

And, are we losing ourselves and our history as we move forward in the 21st century, inter-marrying with hundreds of people from all over the world? Is this progression good or bad? These questions have no definite answer but it is definitely something to think about.

Just a thought.

This blog has been inspried by recent events and situations of a friend.